sigh I wish I was more patient with this kinda things but sigh I can't seem to do it at all.

I just want this last fight from him but I've hurt him too much for him to do that again and it's so difficult for him to trust me again. I  hate myself for leaving him alone. I hate myself for leaving him alone when he is the one. this sounds selfish but I hope he would choose me all over again.

hoping for the best....

will anything happen this 4th?

I want this very last chance to not screw up again.. I meant it when I said I'll love you forever too. Please just give me another chance and tell me how I can be better for you. I am paranoid and insecure because I care, because I don't want to lose you,or be without you. Get it?

this was all a misunderstanding, but the greatest mistake I made, was leaving it as a misunderstanding and not clearing it..

I can’t promise you the perfect relationship, I know that we will mess up here and there, sometimes we may say things out of frustration, but do you know that at the end of the day the relationship that we share is worth more than all that? most importantly I know that you’re worth it. if we make mistakes, then we learn from them and move on because these mistakes will help you and I bond more closer together and reach a higher understanding of one another. I've got you and you've got me, if you ever feel down, I’ll be there for you, I like seeing you happy so I’ll do anything and everything just to make you smile again. I got your back and you got mine, that’s my greatest plan, I’ll stand by you and support whatever you may pursue because what matters to you truly and honestly matters to me. remember, I want you to be happy with me, so that’s what I aim to give you and in my eyes, you will always be worth it. Because I know at the end of the day, we still would go to bed reminding each other how much we love one another. It doesn't matter how we fight in the day. There's no point being angry, because it's just part of building up our relationship isn't it. The fight won't last. And as long as someone gives in, everything is going to be alright. We'll face every tomorrow together, just the same. Don't tell me I don't care because I do, because I'd do anything even if it's silly just to show you how much I care. Yes I want to grow old with you, I'm serious. Every day is an occasion, because you're in it. :) But if everything goes well, it'll feel amazing. Yet your heart will ache anyway, because you’re so scared to screw it all up and the feeling you get by the thought of losing that special someone is almost as awful as not having him at all.

typed one part months ago but Im copying it and pasting it here because I mean it.